i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
her vagine was all disorganized.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
