Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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