got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize