I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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