You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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