What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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