party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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