yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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