If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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