I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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