cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
