I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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