I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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