STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize