If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
