I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She's the barista slut.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize