DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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