somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
