Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize