4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Randomize