ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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