How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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