At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
