Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
i need some magic done to my vagina
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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