wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
