we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
