in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
