oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
