If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
