Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Barsexuality is the new black.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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