when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
