Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
