Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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