U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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