3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
you inspire me to be a worse person
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
