no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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