i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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