Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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