Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
