Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
did you just send me my own nude
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize