Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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