I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
