in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
