is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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