I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
