we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Randomize
