The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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