Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
