We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.