I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
where does the pee come out of this thing
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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