I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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