I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
