Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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